
I find it perpetually ironic that I strive for a fairly worry-free existence, yet every time I start to achieve it, I’m instantly bored. Perhaps this means I need to push myself further in these rare moments of contentment, but I never seem to do that. Right now, for example, things are good. Everything is fine. And I’m pretty bored.
Granted, I’m at work, and there’s almost nothing more mind-numbing than being bored while at work, but I’m sick of daydreaming about all this shit I wanna do and am not actually doing. Why? I’m not sure. Fear. Complacency. Confusion. Lack of funds. Lack of motivation. All these things suck. Not that I’m particularly unhappy, because I’m actually quite happy, but holy fuck, there is so much friggin stuff I want to see and experience it’s tough staying in one spot (aka my office chair or SF) for a while. To help soothe myself, I think about better stuff and look at things I like. I also really secretly hope no one ever looks at this blog cus I honestly think blogging is really egotistical and privately hate the internet. So here’s my personal ego trip.

I'd like to lie in bed, naked, with my best friends or even just cool people. so long as the bedspread was striped and there was patterned wallpaper like this.

even better: cool tiles! I want to sit by the window like this in italy, south africa, tokyo, israel, greece, brazil, and india (again).

Just trippy. I want to know how this photog captured this.

I also want to see clouds like this. perhaps on the plains. I remember being on a service trip in Montana, staying in the most remote Indian reservation as a high school senior and going on a long walk with my best friend to the middle of nowhere. lying down in the middle of the highway, knowing we could never possibly be harmed. the sky there was rad too.

raking balloons seems cheerful.

as does kicking it with a big wabbit. or it could be really creepy (in that donnie darko-esque way).

but nothing is better than this. nothing.

except for the possibility of going wherever you want in your dreams. which is what I do every second of my day.